Internet Firewall To Stop Malaysian Teens Looking At Porn For Seconds Until They Find Proxy Servers

Pornography

PUTRAJAYA:  Today the Malaysian Communications and Multimedia Communications Commission (MCMC) requested Internet providers block access to hardcore porn websites safeguarding the nation’s youth for the valuable seconds it will take them to find ways around it.

“The government is confident it can win this battle against the hormones of the nation’s horny youth,” said an MCMC spokesman, “we expect the XXX ban will force net surfers to think twice about watching hardcore sex in the estimated 12 seconds it takes a tech-savvy teen to find a way past a porn firewall!”

Blocking access to foreign XXX content will inspire more amateur porn movies to be locally produced.  Former MCA leader Dr Chua Soi Lek hopes he will not be starring in any of them.
Blocking access to foreign XXX content will inspire many more amateur porn movies to be locally produced. Former MCA leader Dr Chua Soi Lek hopes he will not be starring in any of them this time.
Malaysia’s internet speed ranking is an embarrassing 127th out of 200 surveyed countries.  It is hoped removing porn traffic will boost our net performance so we can catch up to Cambodia and Zimbabwe.
Malaysia’s internet speed ranking is an embarrassing 127th out of 200 surveyed countries. Experts say removing porn traffic will make netizens feel like we caught up to Cambodia, Vietnam or Zimbabwe.

Malaysia’s Education Ministry were also optimistic about introducing porn firewalls, “It’s never too early for young people to learn valuable skills to help their future careers.  Maybe someday there will be jobs for IT capable Malaysians who can find porn website proxy servers and master bittorrent XXX file sharing!”

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