MAS Flight Grounded Until Everyone Comfortable With Inflight Magazine

KLIA: Customers traveling on Malaysian Airlines (MAS) flight MH784 to Bangkok this morning were delayed for several hours as passengers took longer than expected to clear all the articles in the onboard inflight magazine.

“After recent pictures of rare-cooked meats caused offence, MAS cabin crew are now following new local sensitivity protocols,” explained MAS customer-service manager, Abdullah bin Bakar,

“Once crew have shown the safety exits, checked seatbelts, and instructed passengers how to use their lifejackets, everyone onboard need to leaf through and approve the MAS Going Places inflight magazine from cover to cover before we’re cleared for takeoff.”

As instructed, passengers proceeded to tear out offensive pages from the magazine according to their personal sensitivities and faiths before handing them over to the crew.

One passenger turned up his nose at a picture of a wine bar he would never visit, another lady requested a photo of Adelaide be removed because Australian cities remind her of a bad romance she once had in Perth. There was much onboard debate about this until passengers finally agreed to remove the page.

Once all offensive articles were removed and MAS had formally apologised to everyone for the magazine, flight MH784 was finally ready for takeoff two hours later than scheduled. MAS also apologised for the delay.

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